Better Than Mary Kay

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful." 1 Peter 3: 3-5

I swing in the beauty of your painted world
my new favorite spot for mornings with You
a canopy of branches cheers me on
to the training for inner beauty
and the manual sits in my lap
as the wind dances around us
my little beauty came by for a visit
and the text takes on a layer as I look into her eyes
teach me so I can pass on to her
the freedom of true beauty
beyond makeup and magazine covers
the beauty of knowing You

There's More than Corn . . .

"Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good." 1 Peter 2:2-3

I've always loved corn on the cob
but Saturday
I was introduced to farmer's market corn on the cob
so succulent
when I went for seconds, I didn't even need butter and salt
I never knew what I was missing.

I've always loved my job
but this week
I was inroduced to my new career
so sweet
when I went the next day, I didn't even need the alarm clock
I never knew what I was missing.

I've always loved You
but this year
I was introduced to new depths of You I never imagined
so close
when I wake up each day, I don't even need rhetoric
I never knew what I was missing . . .

Isaiah, Hezekiah, and ABrandNewDay-ah

"If we come expecting God, we will meet Him and be changed by the encounter." Jason Miller, "Illumination" sermon 7/5/07

patterns, structure, and routine
they can comfort like a favorite blankey
or torture like a dripping faucet
provide that coming-home safety
or that punchclock, cubicle monotony
our morning quiet time has not been so quiet lately
reading Your word like a novel
as a New year's resolution is proving tougher than I thought
the shiny cover of the Daily Chronological Bible
now worn with white creases like dried skin
my rose-colored glasses make me wince
as I read of the war, bloodshed, and the violent cycle of Isreal
But this morning I took a moment
A moment to call You near
like an over-the-shoulder tutor whispering new insights
with occasional pats on the back
like scratch n sniff stickers back when pigtails were cool
after trudging through the prophets like mud to my knees
like some pouting child in time out,
listening with my arms folded to the promises of destruction
wrath, wailing,weeping, gnashing of teeth,and sackcloth
but today You reminded me in that gentle tutor voice
that the darkness of conflict tends to illuminate the light of victory
my arms felt like feathers and floated toward the pages
to let my fingers trace new meaning
and Isaiah stepped in with the ultimate preview
"a shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse . ..
He will not judge by what he sees with his eyes...
but with righteousness he will judge the needy"
fingers dance through the pages, light on their tips with anticipation
just then Hezekiah stepped in to break the cycle of royal corruption
"He removed the high places and smashed the sacred stones...
There was no one like him among all the kings of Judah ...
He held fast to the Lord and did not cease to follow him..."
my arms shoot up for a touchdown sign!
and I'm reminded why I should never do my quiet time in public . . .
too risky
so risky I just might look forward to it
so from now on
I will come to meet You
like a child's Christmas Eve,
dusk on the fourth of July,
Price is Right door #3,
or better yet
an opportunity to be near You

"The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned. You have enlarged the nation and increased their joy; they rejoice before you as people rejoice at the harvest, as men rejoice when dividing the plunder. For as in the day of Midian's defeat, you have shattered the yoke that burdens them, the bar across their shoulders, the rod of their oppressor. Every warrior's boot used in battle and every garment rolled in blood will be destined for burning, will be fuel for the fire. For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:2-7

" He did what was right in the eyes of the LORD, just as his father David had done. He removed the high places, smashed the sacred stones and cut down the Asherah poles. He broke into pieces the bronze snake Moses had made, for up to that time the Israelites had been burning incense to it. (It was called Nehushtan.) Hezekiah trusted in the LORD, the God of Israel. There was no one like him among all the kings of Judah, either before him or after him. He held fast to the LORD and did not cease to follow him; he kept the commands the LORD had given Moses.And the LORD was with him; he was successful in whatever he undertook. He rebelled against the king of Assyria and did not serve him." 2 Kings 18:3-7

Thank You

Today I am wordlessly overwhlemed with the many blessings I don't deserve
So I am saying the only two words that have been swirling around in my mouth-gaping head
Thank YOU

"Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Before and After

Cinderella, Moses, and Trading Spaces
Weight watcher scales with smiling faces
What Not to Wear and A Makeover Story
The blooming of a Morning Glory
a tearful mom gets a brand new kitchen
on Extreme Makeover Home Edition
Joseph from the pit to the throne
a lump of coal to a precious stone
desert to paradise and beauty from ruin
hopelessness until You come in
an art easel and my daughter's hand
the Isrealites reach the promised land
makeovers have always pulled me in
perhaps because of who I've been
before You picked up this lump of clay
when life seemed just a shadow play
thank You for helping us make a house a home
and a barefoot yard for Lauren to roam
the master artist of all things new
and for creating us in the image of You
so we too can use our minds and hands
to evoke beauty in limited circumstance
for changing our mourning into laughter
for all Your glory in the befores and afters


"That's what baptism into the life of Jesus means. When we are lowered into the water, it is like the burial of Jesus; when we are raised up out of the water, it is like the resurrection of Jesus. Each of us is raised into a light-filled world by our Father so that we can see where we're going in our new grace-sovereign country." Romans 6:3-5(MSG)

Father's Day

Happy Father's Day, Abba
Thanks for the gentle fatherly advice throughout the day
the blanket of security as I stretched
and woke up to my three favorite guys
I kissed my husband on the cheek
and I took just a minute to watch him sleep
his chest rising and falling like the sun
and despite my back-seat driving
and hands on the hips questions
he is safety
I walked out to the living room and dad was on the couch
with his fishing shows
somethings never change
and as spontaneous as I like to be
it's comfort
a snapshot of my safety before the wedding bouquet
smiling, laughing, crumbs on the table breakfast and onto church
where the pastor reminds me that You are a generous Dad
he asks that we pick a fruit of the spirit
and ask You for more
I scroll the list, thanking You
remembering how You gave me back my joy
how you taught me faithfulness in college
how Lauren teaches me kindness every day
I land on "peace" and something catches
like someone pulling of a mask
it's funny how people tend to think I have it all together
not knowing the "what if" wasps that constantly swarm in my head
I scribble a secret prayer to You and stuff it in my purse
off to the new house to work
it's Father's Day
and my three favorite guys are still giving of themselves
dad doing what he can
painting in meticulous corners with his reading glasses
Cody moving from project to project
a man on a mission of building memories in a setting of beauty
and still taking a moment to take Lauren on the ride of her life
in a little red wagon
and You
giving me this day, these guys, this beautiful view
and a moment of tranquility
Happy Father's Day


"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." Galatians 5:22-23

"Which fruit of the spirit do you need to ask God to increase in your life?" Rob Wegner

"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15

Scribble

Session One: Donald Miller
(author of two of my favorite books "Blue Like Jazz" and "Searching for God Knows What")
1.) "It's the mathmatician not the poet who goes mad. The mathmatician is trying to get heaven into his head; the poet is trying to get his head into heaven." GK Chesterton, Orthodoxy
2.) "Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet was a cry for Protestants and Catholics to come together at the truth of the cross. The Balcony scene was Jesus wooing us. (paraphrased)
3.) Artists help bring heaven to earth. Sometimes a simple poetic grunt and a pointing finger is all people need to find the hope of Christ." (paraprhased)

Sessions Two: Erwin McManus
(author of "Soul Cravings",next on the 'to read' list along with "Orthodoxy"by GK Chesterton)
1.) "Look at your fingerprint. It is evidence of an Artist who scribbled you. It's our permission to scribble outside the lines to create new beauty that points to Him. (paraphrased)
2.) Sometimes our job is to pick up the pens that people dropped in their pain and return them with hope so they might continue writing their story.
3.) We keep hoping for someone else to create the future, so we can react to it. The question is not what kind of church we want to become but rather what kind future we want to create."

Session Three: The Ride Home
1.) Chicago traffic is the seventh circle of Hadeez.
2.) Baked Lays are only delicious when you've waited until 4:00 to eat lunch.
3.) Good conversation is the ultimate energy drink.
4.) Shelley Arredondo and Dalene Stuteville are two amazing women who taught me alot more than any of the one hour speakers.
5.) The look on your family's face when you come back from a trip is mastercard priceless.

Thank you so much, Lord, for this experience
of opening my eyes to all that is right with the world
gathering more crayons in the box
and for permission to scribble...

"This is what God says,
the God who builds a road right through the ocean,
who carves a path through pounding waves,
The God who summons horses and chariots and armies—
they lie down and then can't get up;
they're snuffed out like so many candles:
Forget about what's happened;
don't keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I'm about to do something brand-new.
It's bursting out! Don't you see it?
There it is! I'm making a road through the desert,
rivers in the badlands.
Wild animals will say 'Thank you!'
—the coyotes and the buzzards—
Because I provided water in the desert,
rivers through the sun-baked earth,
Drinking water for the people I chose,
the people I made especially for myself,
a people custom-made to praise me."
Isaiah 43:16-21

Gathering Crayons

http://2007artsconferenceblog.blogspot.com/

Thursday Session One: Efrem Smith
1.) "The problem is that most Christians view themselves as Batman instead of Superman. Batman has no special powers, relies on gadgets, and is motivated by revenge. Superman is from a different planet, and he just wants to save the world."
2.) Insecurity in Christian artists can cripple the spirit of God in a church.
3.) Frustration can be an onramp to a calling from God.
4.) Without storms, you would have no story."

(Um, this session is part of my "next right thing" before starting the job. Tackle insecurity and find a red cape.)

Thursday Session Two: Mark Miller
1.) "A lot of pastors see artists as vending machines of creativity, so how do we restock the machine? We expand our world.
2.) Fill your lives with random input. It's like coloring with the lame four crayon pack at restaurants versus the sixty-four pack. When you expand your world and pray for creativity from God, you'll see colors Crayola hasn't even thought of yet.
3.) You want to unleash endless amounts of creativity? Pray . . .a lot."

(Awesome, now my weird, unpredictable, outside the box, child-like activities can all be umbrella'd into "gathering crayons".)

Thursday Session Three: Jeff Berryman
This was a full-length one-man play called "Leaving Ruin" depicting the life of a Texan preacher and his struggles in ministry. Based on a book by Cyrus Manning with the same title, it was riveting from beginning to end. I was mostly moved by Cyrus' love for individual quirky members of his congregation and his transparent passion for his wife. It was truly an honest story of living in the contradiction.

(Inspiring, made me think I might have to write something like this one day. Lord, I'll give that one to You until further notice. That's a big elephant to swallow.)

Thursday Night film Festival
This night honored media artists from a handful of churches, including ours, and was an amazing gallery of creative minds. I cried during most of the category of "Stories" which included a woman who lost her father to cancer, a couple who almost lost their twin boys, and especially a girl who told about coming to church and not ever talking to anyone. Cody would have loved tonight because of the new techniques and ideas, would have added a few crayons to his box, though he's already coloring from a pretty big pallette.

(A great Matthew 6:1 opportunity. Shhh . . . don't tell. And Cody has got to come with me next year. Maybe we could hide Lauren in the suitcase . . . )


Then the LORD said to Moses, "I will rain down bread from heaven for you. The people are to go out each day and gather enough for that day. In this way I will test them and see whether they will follow my instructions." Exodus 16:4

Just Breathe

In this overload of nuggets of truth
from You and other artists chasing Your beauty
only to repaint it for others
I'm taking a moment to preserve them in a snapshot click...


Session One: Dewitt Jones
1. ) "Creativity is the moment where we see not redundancy but opportunity. It feels like falling in love with the world. Life really is that beautiful when you are open enough to see it."
2.) "When we are growing up, art and life are segregated. Art is the fun elective you get to take after all the boring classes that supposedly prepare us for life. But you can make your life a truly extraordinary piece of art when you celebrate all that is right in the world."
3.) "Begin each day with a full cup, and hang out with people who love their jobs."
4.) Quit flapping and ride the wind. Maybe it's the noise of your own flapping that keeps You from hearing from God."
5.) God built the greatest life lesson into one breath. Take it all in, and give it all back."

Session Two: Nancy Beach
1.) "If we as artists do not speak to the absence of God, we will not awaken the search for his presence. Our message of hope must be rooted in both darkness and light. We must live in the contradiction. Embrace the darkness while pointing to the light. All we can offer sometimes is a bit of a broken hallelujah."
2.) "You have to step through a doorway of truth to find a sense of wonder." Bono

Session Three: Dan Kimball
1.)"They like Jesus but not the church. Most non believers see the church as organized religion and right wng politics, buildings filled with judgemental, male-dominating, female oppressing, homophobic, I'm right-you're wrong, fundamentalists who take everything in the bible literally."
2.) Is your church attractional or missional in nature?"

sometimes i choke
in the captivity of activity
forgetting to float on the breeze of You
even when the wind changes
help me to choose exhilaration over fear
opportunity over redundancy
in the buffet line of turbulence
i long to slow down so i can pickup the pace
and chase You like a child with a camera
through a doorway of truth
i miss the pigtail barefoot
grass-tickling days of simplicity
like a child's first sleepover
and mommy's just a phone call away
only this is not the time for bravery
the dream to speak candidly on Your seeming absence
so they sense Your tangible presence
is now just a sideview mirror away
steady the table of rolling coins
in my neurotic, aftershock, alarm clock mind
where living in the contradiction
all resides in one breath
tonight i lift up a broken hallelujah
as i try to quit flapping and ride the wind
suddenly the lengthy job description
slinkies itself down to one simple word
messenger

"He makes winds his messengers,
flames of fire his servants." Psalm 104:4

Home Sick

"As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24: 16

I almost drowned today
in a pile of dust, dripping piant rollers, and mounds of wall paper scraps
see, the tape measure just isn't long enough
to tell us if we'll really measure up
in "My Country 'tis of Me, Sweet Land of vanity"
it gets hard to hear that still small voice
in the mowing, trimming, sawing, hammering, drilling
HGTV, DIY, TLC world of home improvement
whether keeping up with the Joneses or the Marthas
it all feels a little like that dream
where you're giving a speech in your underwear
like Alice after she stepped through the looking glass
or a constant elementary opposite Day
I wonder if the mother bird ever deals with rolling eyes
when all she wants to do is keep her children safe
When the lies begin to soak in and insecurity begins to bubble
You flood my mind with mission trip memories
and I swim for the surface to find the light of Your truth
the truth is
we are blessed beyond what we deserve
in the global insanity, we sit in the lap of luxury
our little girl now has a yard to play in
this mother bird only wants to create beauty to point people to You
wall color and drapes are just the background
the real vision is
family, neighbors,friends, a safe haven for all who need one
casual coffee conversations in a little nest by the river
that might bring them one step closer to You
and eternal life in the only real home we'll ever know
because maybe
we are all just a little
home sick.

So It Finally Hit Me . . .

It's easy to be strong when the kids are around
that mother hen instinct to be the calm one
play it safe, do a head count, and distance your self
so they can be free and true to the moment
knowing someone has the job of the lookout
but then this afternoon, packing up
it finally hit me
that ice ball in the throat
couldn't be swallowed anymore
so it melted into a puddle of tears
on my poor excuse for a desk
and that weird blubbering that makes people uncomfortable
good thing it's just You and me in this room
and it's getting really hard to see the rest of my checklist
Lord, I'm going to miss these kids so much it's beyond poetry
their contagious smiles
their original silliness
their honest brokenness
their failures that roll into determination
their victories that explode into celebration
their eyes searching for love and answers
their hearts ,
whether hidden in their stories or worn on their sleeves
they are beautiful
I can almost see how much fun You had making them
just being around them was a blessing
as I try to sniff away the blubbering and breath
I give it all to You
the day to day joy of knowing them
loving them and listening
the privilege of having a classroom and a stage
that these prescious souls could
grace with their unique, gifted, amazing presence
but
like everything else in my life
they were just on loan from You
thanks for letting me borrow them for a while
I just pray that I return them
in better condition than I found them
a few delicate touch ups
some dust wiped away
or even better
with an echo of my voice
whispering some awareness of You.


"You did it: you changed wild lament into whirling dance; You ripped off my black mourning band and decked me with wildflowers. I'm about to burst with song; I can't keep quiet about you. God, my God, I can't thank you enough." Psalm 30:11

"The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say 'The children are now working as if I did not exist.'" -Maria Montessori

So Long, Farewell...

Things I will not miss about teaching:
1. Grading essays! (I'd rather have bamboo shoots up my fingernails, but that wasn't in the job description.)
2. Adults who hate teenagers (This would be like me deciding to be a snake charmer. I don't like snakes, therefore, no weird flute and basket for me. Seriously, find a cubicle job . . . on a tropical island... or better yet,find a job that will make you truly happy! These kids have enough people yelling at them, they don't need to add you to their list.)
3. junk mail
4. my favorite question from the students; "Why do you always make us do stuff?", my second favorite: "Can we watch a movie today?"
5. e-mails with the subject line: "reminder"

Things I will miss terribly:
1. the kids (Lord, keep them safe, bless them with confidence, peace, and hope, and send them another teacher who might model Your love for them.)
2. those hidden smiles from under the "I'm too cool for school" looks
3. friendships with other teachers (sometimes just the silent looks of I don't know what to do with them either . . .)
4. the total unpredictability of day to day life with teenagers (like when Shardrieka was caught combing the hair of her imaginary friend Penelope)
5. holding on to the dream of bringing You back in the public schools
6. that "I can't believe I really just did that- I didn't think I could do that" look.
7. set building and design alongside the most artistic teenage minds in history
8. opening nights
9. cast parties
10. did I mention the kids?


As I say goodbye to an era and a dream,
my mind is spinning in the midst of peace.
Will they be okay?
Will I be a little voice in their head?
And then I remember that You were their biggest fan
long before they even entered my classroom
or stepped onto the stage.
So I will sigh, say so long, farewell,
and on Friday
lock my classroom door one last time.

“The most important thing is that I complete my mission, the work that the Lord Jesus gave me — to tell people the Good News about God's grace.” Acts 20:24

"But because God was so gracious, so very generous, here I am. And I'm not about to let his grace go to waste. Haven't I worked hard trying to do more than any of the others? Even then, my work didn't amount to all that much. It was God giving me the work to do, God giving me the energy to do it.” 1 Corinthians 15:10 (MSG)

Gossip 101

sometimes I feel like I’m sittin’ in the back of Gossip 101
a class we’re all in, that sneaky sin that grins
as we sip our coffee
the required course of human nature
where so and so and what’s his name
become the shamed so we can proudly claim the fame
of a well-told story
Once upon a time, a man in his prime of the corporate climb
left the office and never came back.
a simple water-cooler walk, they squawk, and they talk
as if they have the mystery solved.
“Haven’t you heard? A little bird
told me all about it!
He fell for the girl in sales with the pony tail
and the skirts too short, if you ask me.”
Did I ask?
“No, he carried a flask and had a drinking problem.
His secretary said he couldn’t think unless he a had a drink.
And bless her, she just couldn’t stop him.”
Speculations fly, his actions imply, e-mail replies on the sly
‘cuz absence makes the tales grow longer
Even after work, elementary PTA’s compare GPA’s
which kid will make the grade, no time for play
in the race to finish first.
Potluck dishes, compliment fishes, the wife just wishes
she brought the cup that will measure up
to the arm-folding, eyeball-rolling,
purse-slinging, diamond-ringing world of women
Don’t get me wrong
I understand the world of man
isn’t that much better
Like puppeters they joke and sneer
with labels and scarlet letters
deadbeat dads or ivy league grads, oh, that’s so sad,
then they roll away sittin’ a little higher in their shiny SUV’s.
Teacher, can I get a schedule change? This class is strange.
Information exchange like a rifle range,
and who knows who will be the next target?
Or maybe the shooter is me, as I open up my eyes and see
this mirror of truth in front of me.
But man, it’s drivin’ me insane
this stupid wash of the brain
in this honey world of gossip
where lies on lips stick to finger tips
and leave messy fingerprints that aren’t easily washed away.
so teacher, I’m walkin’ out of this class.
Cuz, I know what it takes to do my best and pass the test
So stamp it on the paper,
cuz I will proudly take my F.



Lord, thank you for teaching me the value of others and the truth of a harmful story.

"A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret."
Proverbs 11:13

"A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends."
Proverbs 16:28

"The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man's inmost parts."
Proverbs 18:8

"Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down."
Proverbs 26:20

"The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man's inmost parts."
Proverbs 26:22

Dancing Cheek to Cheek

we all marvel at Your unexpected moments
even after reading Matthew
the same stories remained Ziploc fresh
in Mark, Luke, and John
all pointing to Your love for those who hurt You
"turn the other cheek" You said
but the words became a song
when You danced with Grace
in those last few days
thank you for teaching me the steps
as I called out to You
in the suffering of sandpaper people
lashing out in their own personal pain
with me as an easy target
but I let their sandpaper grow
into the blades of sleepless nights
like moss at the edge of a swamp
or mold in the back of the refridgerator
help me to stop M&Ming the pain
with a thin candy-coated smile
Tonight, I give them to You
so I can finally get some rest,
offer the left cheek
still feeling the sting on the right
and dream of You and I
dancing cheek to cheek


"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain


"But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also." Matthew 5:39

"Forgiveness is not a feeling or forgettting, or even reconciliation. It is a choice we make over and over again, and it has the potential to change everything." Rob Wegner

The Red Carpet

What is it about the red carpet?
walks become struts
smiles evolve to grins
and beauty is magnified
and all because of the idea of importance
from underneath their feet
Who defines star quality?
when botoxed out
and lyposucked in
private jet hamptons
step from limosines
we all cheer and long for their success
but You redefined beauty
made everyone a star
and loved us all with acadamy awards
of Your love and strength
a night of celebration
and I'm reminded
the real red carpet
comes from You
their creator
their personal paparazzi
best friend and loving father
all rolled into one big
red carpet

"Long before he laid down earth's foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love."
Ephesians 1:4a (Msg)

"It is indeed a love story that ties in the beginning of the universe to the end of all days in a fabulous drama ... and YOU are one of the main characters. So if anything that had MY name on it ever made you feel less than magnificent . . . that wasn't real. You are one of the main characters in the story because I made you and I love the way I did it and... I can't get you outta my mind." from "God's Blogs" by Lanny Donoho

Chasing the Wind

like a road sign missed
or a slow moving antidote
I can't figure out exactly when
You helped me stop chasing the wind
when pursed lips and sighs through the nose
punched others like a timeclock
and the ship of reason tossed and turned
on the waves of the swirling sea of checklists
when measuring up and spiraling down
became the dance of sanity
and then You came along
just waiting to hear four simple words
four difficult words for most modern women
"I need Your help"
old habits die hard
but Your breeze blew in the window
the Martha Mary spectrum is changing
and the villian has been unveiled
like conversations suddenly heard
in a room with a crooked painting
playground visits can happen
even when the laundry isn't done
laughter comes before the joke
peace enters before a quiet moment
and love parades despite the weather of circumstance
and it's all because of You




"Perfectionism is a way of being in control; if I can control my environment, I can protect myself from pain and disappointment. Let God be God. He alone is perfect. It's one of the reasons why we worship Him and not ourselves. Artists who strive for perfection are chasing the wind." Rory Noland, The Heart of the Artist

"One of the most shocking contradictions in the American church is the intense dislike many disciples of Jesus have for themselves. They are more displeased with their own shortcomings that they would ever dream of being with someone else's . They are sick of their own mediocrity and disgusted by their own inconsistency." Brennan Manning, Abba's Child

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on, to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me." Phil 3:12

Ashes, Ashes, we all fall down . . .

How do you rebuild a bridge that's been burned?
grieving in the ashes since October
on that crisp day when I had to be the grown up
caught between the boulders of
consequences and empathy
strattling the line between
leadership and love
teetering on the edge of
discipline and grace
like a squirrel on a high wire
all the while looking to You
for the answers
juggling until I dropped one
the effects should have been simple
quick pain like tearing off a band-aid
the scab would heal, and we would move on
instead the pain spread like an oil spill
and she was just trying to swim
and keep her head above water
Lord, the ashes may be too scattered to recover
the bridge may never be rebuilt
but wherever You lead her
after the tassle turns
and the diploma goes into storage
bless her with Your peace
may her talent, her passion
her strong will and unending potential
add beauty to this world
and bring glory to You
her creator, her friend,
and the only teacher
who will never let her down.

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." 2 cor 4:8-9