Sheepish Grin

"God, my shepherd! I don't need a thing. You have bedded me down in lush meadows, you find me quiet pools to drink from. True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction." Psalm 23:1

"Like a shepherd, he will care for his flock, gathering the lambs in his arms, Hugging them as he carries them, leading the nursing ewes to good pasture." Isaiah 40:10

"I am the Good Shepherd. I know my own sheep and my own sheep know me. " John 10 :14

"You were lost sheep with no idea who you were or where you were going. Now you're named and kept for good by the Shepherd of your souls." 1 Peter 2:22

As ankle bitters, we sing of
Mary and her little lamb
and black sheep and his wool
Bedtime stories tickle the imagination
with Little Bo peep and the golden fleece
we count sheep who leap
when we can't sleep
to lull us into pleasant dreams
of pastoral peace
But as sticky fingers grow
into white knuckles in driver's ed
the sheep somehow melt into
mindless followers
a sea of cottonball stupidity
when conformity is taboo
like boys in pink
and leaders somehow begin to
sport invisible Hitler mustaches
to the hormone-driven eyes
of the teenage years
and college only adds lectures
of left and right wings
trying to outflap eachother
but then
the lost sheep is found
and learns to trust the shepherd once again
a lamb at heart, you might say
that's when we step in with the flock
like a noble parade of heroes with funny hats
that's when we see the shepherd for the first time
like learning your husband of ten years
loves your eyes that disappear when you laugh too hard
and that's when we get our sheepish grin . . .
Thank You, shepherd
for bringing me back to my sheepish grin
Now, for the rest of the flock . . .

Sugar and Spice

"A girl possesses nothing but a veil and a tomb." -Saudi Arabian Proverb

"We must all work together to bing change to this earth. We must persist until every female child is welcomed as joyously as a male child." Princess Sultana Al-Saud, Princess: a True Story of Life Behind the Veil in Saudi Arabia

1 Peter 3:7The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God's grace, you're equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don't run aground."

Once again, what I thought was interesting summer reading by the pool has brought me back to the table of worship . . .


The gift of choice
prescious curse
loving risk
in the wrong hands
evil personified
but for me
a blurry black and white blip
and three words of elation
"It's a girl"
American sweetheart of the west
Forbidden curse of the east
Laos, Cambodia, Thailand
sell their girls like trading cards
China hillsides littered with dying baby girls
Midwives in India paid cash
To snap the spines of infants girls
Saudi women imprisoned by thick black veils
in 100 degree heat
Daughters drowned in swimming pools
or locked in rooms for fifteen years
for speaking out of turn
Lord, help them
Whether they call you Allah or God,
Bless these countries
Soften the hearts of the rulers
And thank you for this one nation under God
where I can raise my daughter
as the treasured princess
You created her to be

Make a wish . . .

"This is your life. Are you who you wanna be?" Switchfoot

"What is your life?" James 4:14b


What is it about birthdays
that gets us thinking
about the bigger picture,
the whole forest,
each dot on the timeline,
each puzzle piece,
ingredient,
and stepping stone.
That personal once-a-year holiday
that as an adult
seems paradoxical
no balloons
no cartoon characters
no shiny bows
no proud faces clapping over the candle smoke
often just us
alone with our thoughts
and . . . our age
For the first time this year
I just keep grinning
Like I slept with a hanger in my mouth
No, I haven't arrived
No, I've not achieved every goal
No, I've not reached perfection
But for the first time this year
I can answer the big questions
with confidence
with character
with You.
Am I who I want to be?
Yes, because I'm chasing You.
What is my life?
I squint my eyes
over the candle inferno
breath in
and make a wish
that my life will always be
an arrow
where no matter which way life spins me
I will always point to You.

Leather-bound Cup a Jo

My first job at 16
an eclectic college coffee house
where my gruff overzealous boss
gave me a double espresso
straight up
I vowed I would never taste coffee again
And I never have
to this day
though I am oddly attracted to the scent
as coffee-flavored candles
frequent my home
and coffee-serving bookstores
are frequented by me
as I watch my Starbucks groupy friends
who cannot begin their day
until styrofoam kisses their lips
I smile and think of Your word
strong this morning
but it was just what I needed
like those
freshly-brewed discoveries
in the bottom of the coffee can
where sermons rarely find them
french-roasted parables
that awaken the senses
and rouse the mind
Creamy psalms that blend
with Old testament bitterness
sprinkled with sugary red letters
the consummate concoction
to defy complacency
and jumpstart the soul
with this perfect leather-bound
cup of jo for the soul.
And I wonder how many people
miss out on the joy, peace, revelation
and love of You
because somewhere along the line
they were given a double espresso
of condemnation
that turned them away from this amazing book
meanwhile they love the aroma of You
when they embrace their children
give of themselves
and fight for justice
under the safety of P.C. morality.
I pray that someday they will
take a risk
dive in
with all their senses
and discover
what I have found to be
truly
"the best part of waking up"


"Then those who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost." 1 Corinthians 15:18

"They asked each other, 'Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?'" Luke 24:32

What a Friend We Have

"God keeps an eye on his friends, his ears pick up every moan and groan." Psalm 34:15

"What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and grief to bear, what a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer." Hymn "What a friend we have in Jesus"

Ok, so I have a tendancy to be a whiner sometimes
You know it. I know it.
But today I just want to thank you, Lord.
Thank you for being my friend
and picking up your ears
at all my moans and groans
even when I'm just wallowing
even when I'm just sitting
in a hand-crafted, cluttered mess
as I call out to You
asking You to help me clean it up
whining about how I got there
even then
you love me
even then
you listen
and provide the comfort I don't deserve.
So, no whining today, Lord.
Just praise
For you are
unfathomable
noble
mighty
all-knowing
all powerful
and yet still
loving
kind
merciful
and my friend.

On Every Side

"The LORD gave them rest on every side, just as he had sworn to their forefathers. Not one of their enemies withstood them; the LORD handed all their enemies over to them." Joshua 21:44

Tables have turned
Refreshed and renewed
the holy spirit came like a breeze
that caresses the curtains
with perfect peace
but
Now that same entity
You pulled from my soul
has moved on to my husband
my beloved
my hero
my friend.
Whispering lies of failure,
Consuming, suffocating,
and wearing down his strength,
creating a muddled prison
of deadlines, sleepless nights,
and an endless marathon of measuring up
an elastic jail cell
that grows smaller everyday
Lord, help him.
Come in and attack with your perfect peace
And help me find ways
to usher in that peace
On every side.

"You Complete Me"

"He was afraid and said. "How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God; this is the gate of heaven." Genesis 28:17

"When I died, I didn't flow through a long, dark tunnel . . . In my next moment of awareness, I was standing in heaven. . . the joyousness of the place wiped away all questions. Everything felt blissful. Perfect . . . Time had no meaning . . . As I try to explain this, my words seem weak and hardly adequate, because I have to use earthly terms to refer to unimaginable joy, excitement, warmth, and total happiness. . . Everything I experienced was like a first-class buffet for the senses. I had never felt such powerful embraces or feasted my eyes on such beauty. . . Never, even in my happiest moments, had I ever felt so fully alive. . . It was as if God had removed anything negative or worrisome from my conscousness. . . Then I heard music." Don Piper with Cecil Murphy, 90 Minutes in Heaven

"I Can Only Imagine . . . " Mercy Me

Wow, what a story
Our modern day Elijah
who caught a glimpse
of a million answers
the beauty we chase
and clumsily attempt to create
and 90 minutes of perfection,
completion,
freedom from the slavemaster of time
and the real,
honest to You,
definition of peace
a "first-class buffet
for the senses"
he says
I've always worried
that I'd feel
stupid
for the wasted energy
on the eternally insignificant
sad
for those I love
who grieve my absence
afraid
I'd never measure up,
never fit in,
or be uncoverd
as an imposter
To even stand at the gate,
so undeserving,
so fallible,
so . . . me
But he says
You removed
"anything worrisome"
from his consciousness
I can only Imagine . . .


"Now we see things imperfectly as in a poor mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God knows me now." 1 Corinthians 13:12

One Nation, Under ______

"Believe it or not, our founding fathers actually consulted the Bible when building the framework of this country and in the writing of the Declaration of Independence, and now we can't even hang up a picture of Jesus in a classroom." Mark Beeson (paraphrased)

"We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge, or gallantry, would break the strongest cord of our Consititution as a whale goes through a net. Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other." John Adams, Octover 11, 1798

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:9-10


9-11 got us out of our recliners
as we headed to dusty closets
to pull our wrinkled flags
from under old suitcases and souvenirs
to wave them once again
Yet still it became about us
lives lost became slogans on bumper stickers
so we felt better about doing nothing
and feeling a little something
My Country Tis of Thee
suffragettes left their children at home
and risked their lives
so their daughters could vote
yet we can't seem to find time
to make it to the polls
between soccer games and laundry piles
Sweet Land of Liberty
Abraham Lincoln and Martin Luther King
fused a country back together
with words of wisdom and a Godly dream
but our school cafeteria, our neighborhoods,
are still checkered with the past
Of Thee I Sing
the fourth has become about goofy headbands
the best patriotic T-shirts
with lines we don't believe in
oohs and ahhs at fireworks
and beer talk around the grill
Land where my Fathers died
my parents had pastors speak in their schools
but my students are allowed to skip "under God"
when pledging to the flag
And I could get fired
for teaching them the most important lesson of all
Land of the Pilgrim's Pride
As a mother, I'm a little scared, Lord
If we're not under You,
who are we under?
Let Freedom Ring

Iceberg, Straight ahead!

"People who are struggling to make it in this world without Jesus are just trying to rearrange the chairs on the Titanic. They may think their job is important, but that ship is still goin' down!" (Paraphrased) Rev. Glenn Bone, Good Seed Ministries

"Are you going to continue this craziness? For only crazy people would think they could complete by their own efforts what was begun by God. If you weren't smart enough or strong enough to begin it, how do you suppose you could perfect it? Did you go through this whole painful learning process for nothing? It is not yet a total loss, but it certainly will be if you keep this up!" Galatians 3-4 (Msg)

My Martha Mary Spectrum
is on high alert tonight
for independence seems noble
when the cause is just
like when Martha knew
You and your boys were hungry
but Mary just sat at Your feet to worship
After all, Martha couldn't call in for delivery
And I bet those chairs
looked so pretty in that straight line
like when all the bills are paid
to do lists checked off
and everything in its place
like the same gigantic puzzle
of American mom perfection
I place together again and again each day.
Then a midweek service comes
and a spiritual alarms sounds.
Thank you for those sermons that
wake me up from autopilot
with a loud foghorn
and an "Iceberg! Straight Ahead!"
And help me see Icebergs for others
and sound the call with love.
Only You have lifeboats for every single one of us . . .

Off the Boards

"Be especially careful when you are trying to be good so that you don't make a performance out of it. It might be good theater, but the God who made you won't be applauding."
Matthew 6:1 (Msg)

"on the boards" was what we call it
when you cross the swaying velvet plane
from the dusty concrete wings
into a world, a story,
and a person outside yourself
for some, it was for the applause
the blank stares of admiration
or free drinks after the show
for me, it was an adventure,
a relationship, and a risk I always took
like diving into a book head first
where one night can be a belly flop
and the next a perfect 10
but each time it was real, tangible, and thrilling
the rush of an honest moment,
the freedom of living in someone else's skin
even if it was only for two acts
when each rehearsal was like a date
where you got to know this mysterious person
this ink and paper character a little better
the good, the bad, and the ugly
but you knew they'd be a friend
for you are a savior who took those words on paper
and breathed their soul to life
Much like You did for me, Lord
And now, as I begin to find my place
in bringing the power of theatre back to the church,
Help me remember to leave the theatre for the stage,
live truthfully for You, and find ways to bless others
behind the scenes.

Fading Echo

"Many Times my attempts at leaving a crater of God result only in leaving a fading echo of my own voice." Mark Steele, Flashbang

"Your lives are echoing the Master's word . . . The news of your faith in God is out. We don't even say anything anymore--you're the message." I Thesselonians 1:8 (Msg)

June 21st, only Twelve days out of school
"Class" is a swear word when you hang out at the pool
Staying up and sleeping in, routine has been replaced
Work, driver's ed, social "drama" in cyber circles of myspace,
the next killer party, and searching for the perfect mate
Abercrombie ensembles framing perfect summer dates
For some, it's just surviving in a carnival of no control
Or waiting for Dad's firm knock on the door after his paroll
Sometimes I wonder, did I make dent at all?
Will a part of me be part of them for the true long haul?
When faced with a tough decision, will my face come to mind?
Reminding them to do the right thing and always to be kind?
Are they really changed for the better in any concrete way?
Did I leave a mark on their lives in the minutia of everyday?
Did they know my smiles and furrowed brows were messages of truth?
That I just wanted to love them and teach them not waste their youth?
Do they love their families better? Do they reach out to their friends more?
Did they stop asking why's to dream of what they're hoping for?
Do they stand a little taller in the world of fight or flight?
In a world of darkness, did I shed a little light?
Most of all, when all is said on done, did they see a little of You?
Did I make them question what they thought they knew was true?
Lord, I pray that they'll forget me in the next decade
But that Your lasting, loving voice will be an echo that never fades.

The Beholder

"Beauty is not only a terrible thing, but also a mysterious thing. There God and the devil strive for mastery, and the battle is for the human heart."
Fyodor Dostoevsky

"God's works are so great, worth a lifetime of study—endless enjoyment! Splendor and beauty mark his craft." Psalm 11:1

Our dangling carrots are all the same

whether beauty is seen in the chrome of a motorcycle

or the cracked wood of a hand-crafted antique

in the artist's brush or the guitar strum

in a magazine cover girl or an infant's outstretched hand

in a poet's voice or the click of a camera

in a field of flowers or the shiny city scape

we all race to capture beauty

to hold it

to be it

for someone

And all the while

we don't know

we're really chasing You.

That Darn Cat

"God tells us it's okay to be ordinary. When He puts His "extra" with your "ordinary", you produce extraordinary things." Bishop Kenneth Ulmer

"Obsession with self in the little things is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious free life." Romans 8:6 (Msg)

Like, Alice, I grew up in a perpetual land of elastic dreams
where 99% was a failing grade
and just a few more pounds could tip the scales forever
Where my steps were matched by this
head-bouncing, snicker-scheming, tiptoeing Cheshire cat
whose grin whispered the oozing disease of perfection,
where the stage was the only place he could not follow
because I got to be everyone but myself.
Until a new character was introduced
though I'd known Him all my life.
Until a bedtime story and a book for Sundays
became a moment of truth and a manual for joy.
This man, like scented soap for the soul,
like a loving body guard, picked up the cat by the tail
swung him in circles like a lasso
and flung that darn cat into the great beyond. THWONK!
Though I can still hear his snicker from time to time,
I've learned to stop chasing that little white rabbit.

(sing) School's Out for Summah . . .

"God doesn't play dice." Albert Einstein

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29:11 (Msg)

One hundred and twenty nine precious gifts
fell into my life this year
and what a ride it's been . . .
from pencils in the eye to juice bags stuffed in cargo pants,
from children's books in circle time to scary stories by flashlight,
From silent typewriter to the semester review “extravagameza”
from skirts up too high to jeans saggin' low,
from needing attention to paying attention,
they've challenged me, confused me, worried me,
entertained me, and brightened my life
sort of like I got to see the sneak preview
of the next big blockbuster hit
before anyone even knows it's coming
but now the part I have played is over
and I give them all to You, God.
At least I know they're in good hands . . .

The Gift of a Metaphor

"Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ's love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They're really doing themselves a favor—since they're already "one" in marriage." Ephesians 5:25-28 (Msg)

For some, it's flowers. Others-jewelry. But for me it's the gift of a metaphor . . .

Thank You Lord, for the blessing of my husband who gave me this unexpected present of humor and love all wrapped up in this random little metaphorical e-mail in the middle of my afternoon.

"Dear Kristin,

I’m realizing that it’s a mistake for me to perceive our marriage as a ‘done deal’; something that happened a long time ago, and now it’s simply a utility easily taken for granted. You are soooo much more important to me than that.

You are like the dynamic tides of the ocean.
Beautiful, magnificent, powerful, and
the vital key to the my entire world’s rotation
your waves are soft and soothing, elegant and artful,
the joy of my day, and the peace of my night. ....

AND THEN BOOOOM!
Suddenly your waves turn
to crashing thunderous mountains of malice!
The skies turn black, the winds tear at the sails!
“Batten down the hatches!”
yells Cody, the weathered sea captain.....
BOOOM! “What did I do wrong?”
BOOOOM! “I thought I had this ocean charted!”
BOOOOM! “I thought I knew how to navigate her!”
BOOOOOOOM!

Then the sea captain
makes the worse mistake possible
during such an ocean storm...
“I know!” he yells, “I’ll steer straight at the storm!
I’ll fight it with all I got, till my dying breath!
(*cue the Perfect Storm soundtrack)
—one last giant wave,
destined to topple anything in it’s path
—the sea captain climbing the wave, steering right into it
with all his ignorant vengeance and fury.
“Oh, yeah! Take THAT! You mean ol’ ocean!”

“AAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGH!!!!!” cries the stupid sea captain.
The Ocean storm only gets worse!
The final wave only gets bigger!
“Why doesn’t this work???” the sea Captain wonders,
“I simply can’t win with her!”

KAAABOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!
The wave finally crashes, the sea captain is toppled,
the ocean is left exhausted, weakened and hurt.
Then... eventually her pain slowly sinks
to the bottom of the ocean.
Not really gone, but somehow
subsided.

The captain wonders,
“What can I do to prevent these storms?”
Oh the foolishness of this man!
Then it dawns on him...
I can’t do anything to prevent storms!
And he knows that he can’t just stop being a sea captain,
and run away from the ocean! He LOVES THE OCEAN!
It’s his life!!! She’s actually part of him and he is part of her!
He would just as soon cut off his own head before leaving this ocean!
It gives him such joy, and peace, and challenge, and adventure!
Plus, to him, it’s the most beautiful body of water in the world.

And then he wonders...
“what if, the next time we have one of these storms...
I try turning WITH the waves instead of against them?
Not avoiding the storm, but riding the storm out with the ocean...
Just stay afloat, keep my sails up and listen with all my heart
to everything the wind and the rain and the waves are saying.
I can’t solve the storm, but maybe I can just let the ocean know that I’m still there...
And I’ll never leave. No matter how bad the storms get.”

Well, honey; I can’t promise this ol’ sea captain will ever learn how to do this perfectly, but I certainly will try to do better. For you, my wonderful, mystical ocean : ) I love you. Hope you have a good day.

Love,
Cody"

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of my husband. And thank you, Cody for the gift of a metaphor.
Quick question: next time, could you be in a canoe on a river?--an ocean makes me sound kind of fat . . . Just kidding. You know I love you. Thanks for riding out the storms with me and putting up with all that ebb and flow . . . I want to be like you when I grow up.

June is Bustin' Out All Over

"But blessed is the man who trusts me . . . Never a worry through the hottest of summers, never dropping a leaf, Serene and calm through droughts, bearing fresh fruit every season." Jeremiah 17:7

"June is bustin' out all over . . ." Roger's and Hammerstein's Carousel
(The musical where I met Cody, where our crazy adventure began.)


Every mother (who has not had plastic surgury)
knows the dichotomy, the paradox,
the impending doom and joy that comes
with that chlorene-filled, sunburn-painting entity
known as the first swim of June.
The children like flies to a carcass
rush to splash about in the water-filled pool of delight
trying to hide baby teeth, chattering beneath blue lips
to convince us it's all worth it.
While our job is simple
Keep the little ones from drowning,
the big ones from peeing,
your husband from looking,
and your kangaroo pouch from showing
(even though the joeys were well worth it).
Lord, this year is different.
I'm going to crowd my mind and heart so much with You
that there's no room for frivolous lip-pursing worry
I will dive in instead of suck in.
Instead of wasting time avoiding harmless failures
I will search for You in the heat,
take a dip in the Holy Spirit,
love everyone like Jesus did (even the skinny blondes), and
swim smoothly in this crazy pool of life
with my family by my side and
You in the lifeguard chair,
grinning as You watch us play.

Trees, Knees, and Guarantees

"Live until you die." Mark Beason

"Don't burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don't quit in hard times; pray all the harder." Romans 12:11-12

I can see the devil in the details
How he stretches the trees to hide the forest
Like giant claw-poised creatures in some dark, red rover ballet
"Send her right over!" and I freeze
boots filled with lead and expectations
like running out of energy as the feul prices rise
How he uses his tool of routine like some pendulum hypnosis
lulling me to sleep through the battle
when there are checkmarks to be made, a family to love
People to reach, words to give, and You to serve,
The impact of my knees bounces me like a speed bump
and I come to You for strength.
Lord, show me the forest once again.

"The Classroom" on KBC

"A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired." Proverbs 17:22 (Msg)

"Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on." Bob Newhart

“Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis." from Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey (SNL)

A show called "Teachers" was recently added to the primetime lineup.
The comedic potential was endless. I pictured something like "The Office" on NBC, which, if you've ever worked in an office, and even if you haven't, is unbelievably hilarious. The characters are over-the-top yet completely authentic and believable. The comedic timing of the actors combined with the camera angles and editing leaves me with side aches and pains in my cheeks for days.
So when I heard about this new show, I dreamed of the prospective hilarity that could sweep the nation (and possible result in a national bill to raise teacher salaries-hey, a girl can dream). But--, oh no. The new show was a complete, and horrifyingly shallow, let down. The writers have obviously never set foot in an actual school. I am assuming they were all homeschooled by someone like David Koresh and were sheltered from the amazing situational comedy that arises minute by minute at my place of employment.

So here are a few excerpts from the new hit show "The Classroom" on KBC (Kristin Baker channel). Season Finale airing June 9th. By the way, this is all based on true occurrences. The names have been changed to protect the innocent . . .

Scene One:
Teacher: "So, Mike, you look deep in thought. What do you think Langston Hughes means by 'My soul has grown deep like the rivers'?"
Steve: What? Oh, I'm sorry I was just thinking about how cool my shirt is . . . you likey?
(sigh)

Scene two:
Teacher: "So what does the green light at the end of Daisy's dock symbolize for Gatsby?" Jason?
(Shot of Jason with a piece of paper taped to his forhead covering the top half of his face with detailed illustration of wildly wide eyes and bold words below that read. "I'm not asleep. I promise.")

Scene Three:
Teacher: Megan, where's your essay?
Megan: (fast, all in one breath) So I put it on a disc, right? Cuz our printer wasn't working, and then I tried to e-mail it to you, but our internet wasn't working b/c my mom couldn't pay the bill because there was this Prada purse that she really needed and she let me borrow it, isn't it cute? anyhoo, I had it on disc, and then my little brother took it and was like playing fetch with our dog with it, and I was all like "Oh my gosh if you don't give that to me I'm going to strangle you in your sleep" and he was all (Mimmicking a "special" little boy, which he is not) "Finders keepers" and I was all "it's mine you little creepy dork face" and then my dad came in and was all (deep manly voice)"What's going on here?" and I told him, but he wouldn't believe me so then he said there was this guy in the bible who cut a baby in half so the two chicks fighting over it would stop, and Tommy was all like "do it, Can I get the saw?" and I was all like "Dad! No! It's got my English essay on it!" But then Snickers, that's our dog, came and snatched it and buried in somewhere in the back yard, and I tried to dig for it, but I got all icky, anyway can I get one of those little extension thingies?"
(teacher deadpans camera)

and that is only the tip of the iceberg . . .

Thank You, Lord for the gift of humor, laughter, and the lighter side of this life you've given us. I wonder if the angels tell you jokes sometimes. I bet you have the greatest laugh . . .

Happy Blogiversary

"We throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door to us. We find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand—out in the wide open spaces of God's grace and glory, standing tall and shouting our praise. There's more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we're hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next." Romans 5:2-4 (Msg)

Today is the one year anniversary of this blog.

365 days of my life
recorded in this odd potpourri of language
my muddled thoughts from somewhere deep
between my gut and my head
danced to my fingers, click, click the keys
and somehow a picture of a year was taken,
or a Monet scene from our walk was painted,
perhaps a song sung with head tilted back, neck veins bulging,
or something whispered in a desperate breath.
52 weeks of chasing You to find myself
Only to find it's not at all about Me.
Standing at the door of those wide open spaces
carrying a backback of hemmed in troubles
that blossomed into passionate patience
and the tempered steel of virtue
(It's kinda heavy, but so is buried treasure)
click, click
can't wait to see the sequel, Lord . . .
cuz I just can't get enough of You.


"Drench yourself in words unspoken.
Live your life with arms wide open.
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten."
Natash Bedingfield "Unwritten" (song)

Thimbles, Buckets, and Barrels

"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22

"Then he touched their eyes and said, 'According to your faith will it be done to you.'” Matthew 9:29

"If you bring God a thimble, he’ll probably fill it. If you bring God a bucket, he’ll probably fill it." Rob Wegner


Lord, why do I bring buckets of faith
echoing hope in a silent clang of metal
when expecting blessings for others,
But when (if) I come to You
for something for myself,
I balance a teetering thimble on a fingertip,
look up with this lip-biting, eyebrow-scrunching,
shoulder-shrugging faith of mine
and say "Sorry to bother you, but . . .
You know, if you get a chance,
but, if not, it's okay ,
I mean I know I don't deserve it,
but if you think it'd be okay,
I, uh, was wondering if . . ."
Sometimes walking away with a feet-dragging
floor-scuffing, probably-not stride of never-minded defeat.
Lord, like the doubting father said
"Help me overcome my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)
Lord, help me grow, graduate, take the next exit
from this dusty highway of a weakened faith
and put my mind back in its place.
So eventually I will bring barrels for us all
with a "show them", not "give me" faith
that is all for the glory of You.